The Lord has been working on my heart this morning during my
quiet/Bible time…particularly with self-image…Why are we so eager to accept and
embrace negative thoughts towards ourselves? Willing to form and hold on to
negative destructive self-talk and inner dialogue that if we were ever to utter
out loud or hear someone else talk this way we would be shocked by what we heard. I am quick to try to encourage or correct a friend or acquaintance if I hear them talking bad about themselves and yet my self-talk goes unchecked...and could really use a pep-talk itself. Can you relate?
“I think therefore I am” is a saying that many of us have heard before and it holds a tremendous
amount of truth. What you think about and dwell on consequently becomes who and
what you are. Wise words…and humbling if we will believe them. What we think about the most
becomes our reality. If you were to record your thoughts and then list them out…what
patterns would you see? Would they be positive, uplifting? Or would they be
full of negative self-criticism? Our self-perception can often become skewed
towards the nit-picky parts about what we hate when we think or look at
ourselves. We focus and dwell on our faults and preconceived weaknesses, ugly
words forming over our heart, words that we would never think of saying to
someone else…so why to do we so eagerly pick ourselves apart and embrace and
encourage self-hatred through our inner dialogue?
This is especially pertinent if we are Christians because
this is anything but the way that God sees us.
Numbers 13:31-33 is a prime example of how our self-perception
effects our lives by either limiting us or liberating us. The Israelite's were
instructed to scout out the Promise Land that they were to takeover, a land
that God lead them to. But the report is interesting. Despite the God that lead
them out of Egypt and had been providing for these people time and time again,
the Israelite's continued to adopt a poor opinion of themselves. Focusing on
what they weren’t capable of and even verbally calling themselves
“grasshoppers” in comparison to the giants of the land and the seemingly
impossible feat that they would have to confront and overcome.
I couldn’t help but ask myself, why do I choose a
grasshopper mindset? Choosing to focus on self-image, breaking me down piece by
piece, focusing on what I don’t like about myself or what I believe I am
not…and ultimately defining what I am…belittled. I need to take ownership of my thought patterns. Becoming aware of them is
not enough, it is a battle and you have to consciously and intentionally choose
to fight day in and day out. Replacing the negative thoughts and lies as
quickly as they come with God’s life giving and positive truth so that they
have no place to anchor and take root. Some days this is easy and other days it
is the hardest fight of my life to overcome.
I battle this from time to time and am reminded of this when my husband
compliments me when I am in a state of perceived
rawness…think yoga pants, unwashed face, no makeup and hair in that awkward in
between haircut/growing out stage. Why do I cringe inside when he tells me that
I’m beautiful? Sometimes I even cringe on the outside, quickly looking away or
bury my face in his embrace where I can mumble a muffled almost inaudible
“thanks” at his words. A quick transition to move on from that moment. I choose to
brush it aside, to downplay his words. Why can’t I see myself the way that Ben
looks at me? I am lying to myself when I try to convince myself that it’s just
being “humble” when really it’s because there is a dark stronghold of
insecurity and fear that is trying to root itself over my heart…those weeds of
self-doubt, holding on to my heart, choking out the love and truth of how my
husband sees me, how God sees me, who God made me to be. I do so long to be
able to embrace and see myself this way rather than defining myself to
standards of beauty that the world has embraced. However accidental I
repeatedly place my self-worth on the physical and material aspects of myself
rather than on what I am made of and who I am and especially who I am in Christ.
We are the image and glory of God (1 Corinthians 11:7), that is how He created
us to be, in His image (Gen 1:27). I don’t think it is very glorifying to God
when we are finding faults with how God formed us. It isn’t glorifying to
embrace the lies of the enemy rather than to embrace the truths of the Creator.
There is a scene from the 2015 film, “Cinderella” that
replays in my mind. It is after her stepmother and stepsisters have teased her about her
appearance/dirty from the cinders after sleeping by the fire to keep warm, and so her soot covered face and they come up with a nickname for her.
This nickname is used and adopted with such regularity that it replaces her real
name and becomes the very title for the story. Shortly after this nickname is
used, Cinderella then catches a glimpse of herself in a copper pot, staring at
her reflection that is warped from the smudges and dings in the pots surface,
and yet she is overcome in that moment and only sees herself as this warped
projected image shows, the words of her stepsisters ringing so loudly that they
block out the truth of who and what she is.
Throughout the Bible there are numerous examples of where the
Lord gives people new names… Abram becomes Abraham and Sarai his wife becomes
Sarah (Genesis 17:5, 15), in John chapter 1, Simon becomes Peter. Each name has
a meaning, the old self and the new self. The old worldly image that is
replaced by the new image that God has assigned and given us.
Just imagine if Abraham or Sarah or Peter refused to accept
their new name and new and true identity that Christ established for them...
Why do we use warped and dinged pots as our looking glass
and mirrors rather than looking at ourselves through a clear mirror, a mirror
gifted to us by God, a mirror of Truth that is available to look at every time
we open His word and allow that light to penetrate our hearts and to light up
our true image.
What would you feel if you were to let go of those lies and
cling to how your Heavenly Father sees you?
What grasshopper views are you accepting and proclaiming
over your life? What ways are you clinging to those dinged, dirty and warped
copper pots? Are you clinging to the old rather than embracing the new image
that Christ has established for you? I want to adopt the identity that God
wants me to embody don’t you? Let’s replace the lies with truth, call out those
negative thought patterns and replace them with God’s truth and then perhaps slowly
but steadily we can begin to see ourselves as God sees us, with an accurate,
clean reflection.
A Prayer:
Dear Lord, help me to see myself as you see me, a clear reflection of your creation. Open my heart to receive and feel the truth of who you have made me and please help me to embrace my self perceived imperfections and rather see them as you do. I want to give you my best but I also want to give you my imperfections and insecurities to work as well. Help me to embrace how and who you have designed me to be and use these things as you see fit. Thank you for my strengths and my imperfections for they all make me unique, a one of a kind masterpiece. You are such an amazing Father and I am so grateful for this life that you have given me. In your glorious name I pray.
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