It’s in the little things…

It is always in the little things. Those little gestures that mean so much...often undervalued, more often overlooked.

 

“Flowers for my flower”, he said gently. He then drew from behind his back and presented me with a beautiful bouquet, bright plums and yellows offset by his dark shirt and shades of green surrounding foliage. I had to struggle not to dismissing this gesture, categorizing it as "corny" because it was anything but. This is our own story, a real moment filled with alstroemeria, hydrangea, spider mums and lilies surrounded by a gentle shush of greens and architectural eucalyptus …fragrant, bright, brilliant…almost overshadowing the gleam in his eye, proudly beaming, eager for my acceptance of this offering…”What is this for?” I asked, wondering if he knew something that I didn’t…”Because I love you” he replied. And that is enough…enough to make me swim into his shirt folds, and cling tightly, to open my heart a little more and allow. Allow love to pour in, to overwhelm me…I should allow more often…it feels wonderful. These are the moments when I question my walls…walls that we all have built in various ways for various reasons. But, I am working on this and eagerly, for although I have had time and experience with setting up my heart fortress…carefully constructing bricks of independence, distance, determination and career (to name a few) to build a lovely shield for that vulnerable life pumping muscle… Until now…now when I realize that it is time, time to disassemble a part of that wall and allow a doorway that is always open to receive and even more readily open to give.

I am ready, to the opening of my eyes to a yellow light-filled room, warmth, home…peace. So this is what peace feels like, a quieted world that moments ago was filled to overflowing with sounds and electric energy, of hellos and goodbyes, of busyness and urgency, laughter and dancing. I gaze eager to soak in and cherish every last detail like jewels inset into crowns of gold. Linen folds and the quiet whirring of the man-made AC unit, the pleasant sound of the one you love, “resting his eyes” as he calls it, for just "one" minute. Content to let him take all the time in the world…our world. A world that belongs to us in these moments. Granting us a pass to enjoy time, frozen, like blocks of ice stacked in rows of memories. Like those linen creases, I will tuck these memories into my heart folds.

I don’t want my perspective to change…to let tarnish set in, staining the luster that love lets shine, our own reflections shining back at us upon that surface. 

I don’t want to stop doing the little things, or noticing and allowing the little things, the in between moments of every day…They are brilliantly displayed like this gift of petals sitting on a wooden table, reminding me of what I will allow.

Thank you my love, for this reminder.
~ H.